Womanthismonth.com October 2024 63 OPINION | parenting Mastering the Mindset Supporting kids to be courageous, determined and reflective in these ways requires a growth mindset, understanding that skills and intelligence are developed and not inherited/set — that people are generally good at something because they have cultivated their abilities over time and those who are not just haven’t dedicated the time. Recognising that we are in control of our abilities enables us to focus on the process of learning and growing — encouraging us to stretch ourselves to try new things, persevere until we reach our goals and think about what we can take from each experience. Here are some things you can do to make sure your children are poised to practice and grow these three superpowers: 2. Lead By Example It’s incredibly powerful for kids to see their parents trying new things — especially if they’re not awesome at them from the start. For example, if you’ve always wanted to learn to draw, get a sketchbook and draw for 10 minutes a day. Let your kids see the consistent effort you’re putting in and your artwork. Or sign up to run a 5K, 10K or a marathon (whatever’s just outside your comfort zone). 1. Name and Recognise While the abilities to be courageous, determined and reflective live within every kid (and each one of us), developing the mindset we desire requires self-awareness and practice. Talk to your children about these three words, help them understand their meaning (for example, what being determined does and doesn’t look like in a particular situation), and how and when to practice each. Then, regularly recognise them for their practice, describing the behaviour. For example, “I know it took a lot of time and effort to complete your maths homework, great job being determined!” As kids become familiar with these mindset elements and how to use them, they’ll start to recognise and articulate the practices they see in themselves and others. 3. Embrace The Power of ‘Yet’ Using the words ‘not yet’ as a powerful way to reframe kids’ learning efforts: It’s not that they can’t do something, they just can’t do it yet. Remind your child that almost no one is great at something the first time they try it. So if they don’t immediately excel at a new thing, the good news is that they’ll be a little better at it the next time… and even better the time after that. This season, as you check off all the items on the school supplies list, remember that the most critical tools your kids need don’t fit in a backpack. Set your intention to teach your children what it means to be courageous, determined and reflective. Help them grow these mental superpowers and learn how to wield them for a successful school yea and a fulfilling lifetime of learning.
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